girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
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