i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
