I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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