She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
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