Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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