HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
