In the future we'll all be gay
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Randomize
