that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
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