I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
