I like my sex mixed with concussions.
Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
Everything about him screamed your future.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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