I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
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