Fine. I'll sleep in my office
Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
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