we're blogging at a bar
I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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