Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Randomize
