I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Randomize