you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Randomize
