I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
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