If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
Randomize
