mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
Randomize
