Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Randomize
