So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
Randomize
