normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
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