That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
two words: eviction party
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
No I am not eating basil off your cock
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize