he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
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