It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
