Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
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