He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
You had me at "let me see your balls"
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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