I want to have your abortion
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
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