New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
