he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Randomize
