Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
