She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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