so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Randomize