I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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