Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
