This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
i will never coherently bang her
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
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