guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
