So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
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