all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
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