the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Don't tell me you're on acid again
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
Randomize
