I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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