I'm drive I can fine osifer
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
