I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
I'm just crazy horny about you
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Randomize