i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
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