Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
