Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
im calling her cock vulture from now on
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
