Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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