I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Randomize