the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize
