I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
