Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
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